BURGER WARS
FAST FOOD. FAST WARS.
A Novel by S.R. Moore • Published by I.R. Onic Publishers
FLAME-GRILLED JUSTICE. DEEP-FRIED DEATH.
Twenty years ago, fast-food behemoths Ron's Burgers (Red 'R' logo) and General's Chicken (Yellow Chicken Portrait logo) decided that assassinating health-conscious TV chefs was just good business strategy. Fast forward through two decades of corporate escalation, and the UK high street has turned into an open war zone.
Recruits don tactical body armour, trade mortar fire for menu supremacy, and proudly lay down their lives for free extra-value meals for life.
Enter Marcus—a white recruit who got accidentally preserved in a walk-in freezer in the early 2000s. Thawed out into a smog-choked wasteland where drones scan retinas for unlogged assets, the grease is pressurized, and Marcus is diagnosed with "Fryer Fog", he just wants to find out what happened to the girl he loved. Instead, he's slapped with a spatulated rifle and drafted straight to the frontlines.
*** MEET THE SQUAD ***
Marcus
The man out of time, equipped with a spatulated rifle, fighting under the Red 'R' banner of Ron's Burgers.
Trevor
Marcus's loyal friend, with a drive-thru headset permanently fused to his skull for frontline comms.
Vera
Fierce Crew Trainer rocking iconic bright pink hair and dispensing tactical ration updates.
🪙 8-BIT SIDE-SCROLLER ARCADE 🪙
DEFEND THE UK HIGH STREET AS MARCUS AGAINST THE YELLOW-CLAD CLUCKERS!
BURGER WARS: FRONT-LINE
Marcus (Spatulated Rifle) vs General's Chicken Cluckers!
🗺️ BURGER WARS: POOLE HARBOUR STRATEGY 🗺️
Drag neon supply lines from your Grillers to swarm and conquer enemy stores across Dorset!
*** PICK YOUR SIDE ***
ENLIST YOUR LOYALTY IN THE WAR FOR MENU SUPREMACY
RON'S BURGERS
"GRILL FOR FREEDOM"
Flame-grilled discipline, Red 'R' insignia, and mandatory smiling through the corporate war zone.
GENERAL'S CHICKEN
"DEEP-FRIED JUSTICE"
Yellow chicken portrait logo, yellow-clad Cluckers, and pressure-fried tactical dominance.
🍔 TACTICAL MERCH & RATION SHOP 🍟
ONLY THE BOOK & EBOOK ARE AVAILABLE NOW. EVERYTHING ELSE IS CLASSIFIED 'COMING SOON'.
Paperback Edition
Physical dead-tree frontline edition.
£9.99
Buy PaperbackeBook Edition
Instant digital brain download.
£2.99
Buy eBookFree Meals for Life Card
Guaranteed titanium laminate card (valid until franchise collapse).
£24.99
Spatulated Rifle Replica
1:1 scale plastic grease-rifle prop with built-in spatula.
£149.99
Walk-In Freezer Pod
Home cryo-preservation unit guaranteed to preserve you for 20 years.
£3,499.00
Eau de Fryer Grease
Signature perfume blending notes of old canola oil, salt, and panic.
£45.00
Fused Headset Implant
Permanent cranial headset for receiving frontline dispatch chatter 24/7.
£89.99
Kevlar Apron Armor
Level III-A grease-resistant body armor with built-in condiment holsters.
£119.99
⭐ REVIEWS FROM THE FRONTLINE ⭐
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: S.R. MOORE
S.R. Moore is a literary titan and proud owner of at least three books. A decorated veteran of the fast-food trenches, Moore is a three-time McDonald's Employee of the Month winner—an honour that provided both invaluable first-hand research into corporate burger culture and a deep, unshakeable respect for the soft-serve machine.
Burger Wars is Moore's debut novel, written under the strict belief that customer service should always be taken to its absolute, chaotic extreme.